Wanna kill yourself ? 

Imagine this. You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time. You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mom this. Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mommy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying. The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out. It’s a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days. It’s two years later. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex boyfriend doesn’t know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with girls. Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day. People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just effect you. They effect everyone. Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for. Things can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are. Even if we’ve NEVER talked before, I’m here for you.💕

No one was expecting it to happen and no one ever thought that it would. That's the problem that we seem to face more often now. We tend not to think about something until it's too late. If you see someone and you get a bad feeling that they aren't doing okay, please check in on them. Better done than never. Don't wait until it's too late.

Suicide isn't selfish, for someone to feel so bad they want to kill themselves is not selfish. Some people are bullied, and others suffer from mental illness. Mental illness is an everyday battle, I suffer from it myself. This is something I've never truly shared but while I have never gone as far as to attempting suicide myself, I have suffered from suicidal thoughts. I've considered overdosing on Xanax. Even though you may not attempt suicide, having those thoughts in your mind are just as dangerous, and scary. But Please Don't Let Suicide Win  !

If you are considering suicide, please take a few minutes to read this. You might feel helpless, you might feel depressed and you might feel worthless but you are not alone and it WILL be okay. As much as you think it won't, it really will be okay. Time heals pain. It might take you a month or it might take you a year but I can assure you that you are not alone and you will be okay.

If you commit suicide, you will leave everyone questioning what they could have done to prevent it. You will have people wondering if there was something they could have said or even a small action they could have taken to save your life. I think the worst part of it is that forever and ever people will wonder WHY?

WHY DID YOU FEEL SO SAD?

WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ANYONE?

WHY DIDN’T YOU ASK FOR HELP?

WHY DID YOU FEEL LIKE THAT IS THE ANSWER?

Emotional problem is another reason we may push others away. Depression and wanting isolation may make us feel worthless and want to keep our distance from others and only be with ourselves and our own thoughts. We may then push others away, or it may appear as such to other people because we neglect them and isolate ourselves from them.

And another reason begin that it’s not the right time. Essentially what this means is that it may not be the right time in your life to meet a particular person, or it could seem like too much. Let’s say a person comes into our lives that is perfect, like a perfect ideal romantic relationship for us. But, it is a bit too much for us right now. Meaning that they are just too good for us at this given time, since we may feel like we have a lot of work to do on ourselves first.

Your mental illness does not define you. There is so much more to who you are than your struggle with depression. The social stigma on mental illness may lead others who don't know you personally to stereotype the type of person that you are. Little do those people know, your struggle with depression does not mean that you are weak and always sad. Your struggle with depression shows how strong you really are. You have been strong for so long that you can no longer handle it. You can be the happiest person in the world and still struggle with this illness. Do not let your illness define you, keep shining. You are unique and precious.

Your life has value. You matter. Regardless of what you have been told in your lifetime, your life truly does mean something. There are times when you may not feel like it, but the second that you give in to that thought you make yourself vulnerable. Believe me, I know that it's easier said than done to brush it off when someone says or implies that your life is worthless, but it is not true. Life is a gift that allows you the opportunity to become more, don't take that for granted.

So many people care about you, even if you think they don't. You are not alone. Family, friends, acquaintances and classmates all care. Of course you will run into a few selfish people here and there who only care for themselves, but the majority of people care. They want you to be happy and they want you to succeed and win your battle with depression.

You are loved. Somebody on this earth loves you. Your family would not be the same without you and neither would your friends. People care for you deeply, and their hearts would shatter if anything bad were to happen to you.

People will miss you. You have impacted the lives of so many--every person you have ever met in some way or form has been impacted by your existence. You will be missed; there is no doubt about it.

There is so much more to life than the struggles you are facing. You're going to get older and you're going to achieve so much in life. You'll leave high school and begin a whole new chapter--a chapter where you get to choose what to do with your life. You don't have to follow a set plan. The world is yours.

Things will get better. The beautiful thing about life's hardships is that good things always come after. Like the saying goes, "April showers bring May flowers," you must have dreary days before beautiful flowers can bloom. You are stuck in April right now, and I promise that you will get to May and experience a beautiful part of life.

God loves you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

If you need help, please don't hesitate to ask for it. There is so much that can be done to try to kick your depression to the curb. All it takes is for you to talk to someone.

I've been where you've been. I know that all of this is easier said than done. I know that it's hard for you to understand. The chemicals in your brain tell you to ignore all of this, but I've been where you have been. Things will get better.

Keep fighting.

1. Educate yourself

Chances are you know someone who suffers from a mental illness. Whether it be a family member, a friend, a peer, teammate, a friend of a friend or even yourself, most of us know someone who is living with a mental illness. Education is arguably one of the most important things we can do for those who struggle with a mental illness. By learning about the specific illnesses people face, you may be able to understand more of what it is people go through on a day-to-day basis. Understanding different mental health conditions can allow you to better support the people you know who are facing these battles.

 2. Be aware of your attitudes and behavior

We’ve all grown up with prejudices and judgmental thinking. But we can change the way we think! See people as unique human beings, not as labels or stereotypes. See the person beyond their mental illness; they have many other personal attributes that do not disappear just because they also have a mental illness.

 3. Be an advocate

We have to have start the conversation about mental health. It takes vulnerability and courage to have these difficult conversations, but talking about mental illness is the only way to end the stigma. Sometimes, this might mean opening up and sharing about yourself. It can also mean creating a safe place for someone to come and share their story. When we come together and have these conversations-when we invest in the stories of other people-it gives us the power to make a difference in the lives of others. You can encourage others to lead by example through the use of person first language, and correcting those who do not speak correctly about mental illness.

 4. Support people

You do not have to have a mental illness to support those who do! Everyone can help raise awareness about mental health. Treat people who have mental health problems with dignity and respect. Think about how you’d like others to act toward you if you were in the same situation. If you have family members, friends or co-workers with substance use or mental health problems, support their choices and encourage their efforts to get well. It helps others know that they are loved, supported and not alone.

  5.Practice empathy and compassion

Kindness is the most powerful, least costly, and most underrated agent of human transformation. It is simple and even cliché but cannot be said enough: be kind to one another. We are all facing our own demons, challenges and struggles. We are all fighting battles in which others may know nothing about. Be the reason someone smiles today, hold the door for someone and help others when you can. Give people the benefit of the doubt and practice forgiveness. All we want in life is to love and be loved. Each and every day, we get the opportunity to decide what kind of impact we will have on the lives and world around us—make it a good one. Sometimes, a selfless gesture or a moment of reassurance, even something as simple as a smile can be enough to save someone.

 6. Listen

If you have been deemed trustworthy and safe by someone who is struggling, embrace it. It is not always easy to let others in. Sharing some of our deepest and darkest secrets with others is not easy. That being said, it is not always easy to take on all of that. It is okay to not know what to say or what to do. Listen; be present, and offer hope. You don't have to understand what they're going through, or know the perfect things to say or know exactly what to do. But you can listen. You can whisper words of hope and encouragement when they are drowning in the screams of darkness. You can take them for a drive, eat ice cream, be a shoulder to cry on, or just sit with them. It may not feel as though you are helping, but believe me, you are just by physically being there.

 7. Educate others

Find opportunities to pass on facts and positive attitudes about people with mental health problems. If your friends, family, co-workers or even the media present information that is not true, challenge their myths and stereotypes. Let them know how their negative words and incorrect descriptions affect people with mental health problems by keeping alive the false ideas.

 8. Share your story

If you or someone you know is living with a mental illness, encourage them to share their story. It took me years to find my voice, but I am so happy that I did. We are all just living stories that want to be heard, understood and validated. I decided to share my story because everyone deserves to know that their story is important, and their voice will be heard; there are people who will listen. People can read my story and know that they are not alone. You too can share your story. Everybody has different experiences, different perspectives, all of which add value to the lives of others. When you share your story, you let others know that it is okay to tell theirs.